Helpless but appreciate

I want to share about my feelings right now because I don't know what to do with it. I really dont like the feeling of helpless. Sometimes can make me feel like I hate myself for this. I know I shouldn't feel this way, so I am here to share and I have already shared to God but not enough. I also suppose to do my studies but keep thinking about this. But I will make this a quick blog. 

I have a friend who is very close to me. It is sad to tell about my friend's story. From this close friend of my, I have learnt so much from this person. I have learnt that life is actually unfair most of the time. This makes me wonder, God is there or not? I know I shouldn't doubt Him, I have to tell myself God has reasons for things happened and have to learnt to trust Him. Honestly, I thank God for everything what I have right now, I have a family that can support me with FINANCIAL and love. When I have everything, I don't feel the suffering of getting double jobs to support myself with my daily living. However, I have learnt to appreciate the money I have with me and know how to use the money wisely. I also learnt what are not important to me and even with what I enjoy but I able learnt to limit myself and still able to make me happy with what I have. I remember this verse, "And I am not saying this because I feel neglected, for I have learnt to be satisfied with what I have." Philippians 4: 11. Yeah, even I don't have something, I won't feel neglected but happy with what I have right now. 

With the life that go smoothly, not everyone have that kind of life, someone that close to me already has this problem. From the life that I have, I couldn't understand what going through in my friend's mind. I wish I can understand and able to help my friend. I know my friend will say you don't understand my problems, don't bother me. I know not just my friend, but people around me that have problems that haven't share by them. At one point, I just want to be with my friend and other people around me. I just don't want to feel they are just by themselves. I understand about their feelings, I just don't like them being themselves and ignore my help. I don't want them to focus on their problems and thinking is the end of the world. Yeah, this is why I feel helpless. Right now, I am desperately praying for my friend. 

You know, I just found my own motivation to study really hard with no excuses. I learnt that if I am not working hard for my own, how can I work hard for others. I also believe, God with bless me for working hard for something meaningful or I cherish the most. I wanted to show I actually appreciate what I have. I am thankful of knowing my friend's story.